Today is a day worth remembering. So many crazy things happened.
I was sitting in McDonalds as per usual, enjoying their free internet and lovely smells of grease and poverty when three really cute brown girls walked in. And I mean my favorite shade of golden brown. The color of persians, who I am ironically a big fan of. I was talking to Maximilian online and he managed to get me super nervous. The cutest one first bends over in front of me to show me her thong, then changes her mind and sits right next to me. With max freaking me out on my computer screen I finally open her by asking about the internet. I’m not even kidding. I find out she’s not from this neighborhood and I am close to seizing. Usually, my anxiety disappears once I open, but not today. Max keeps telling me to turn on my webcam and let him talk to her. After about 30 seconds the shameful conversation dies.
Her two cute friends join her and I just sit here getting berated by my former friend. A super creepy weird guy opens them from the other side. He has some crazy red rash on his hands he keeps scratching and keeps asking if they are Indian and if they know this family or that family. After he leaves, which takes ages, they all talk about him being in a cult. So I open by saying it was rude of him not to try and recruit me! They think that’s funny. We chat for 10ish minutes before they leave. One girl is 13 and the cute one’s younger sister. I tell them I thought they were all 25, so she loved me. I think she wants me for a big brother now. Safe.
On the train back from my new job, there is a smoking hot brunette across from me. Really sensual. I am in the grip of crippling aa and I am imagining Sasha cackling in my ear. I keep running through like 50 openers. I keep using the excuse that we are surrounded by people and I am wearing a suit which is like 6 sizes too big now. I blame London Hunk. So then everyone clears off the train at one stop and we are alone, facing each other. I am such a coward. Then the train stops. I’m not even kidding. We were on a dead train for like 10 minutes. It takes me 9 to think of a situational opener. How unlike me. Turns out she is a bar manager late for a meeting. One stop away. I get the name of her bar as she gets off the train. Nice girl.
I come back to McDonalds to have more internet. I am working on a host of projects. I get a text back from HBSkinny. The first girl I ran ShaneGame on. This is the hottest number I’ve ever gotten. Logistics have prevented a Day2 for 2 weeks and she is still texting me back. She is so sexy. She lives in my old city. She wrote a text twice as long as mine explaining how she is going away for the weekend. I just feel really nice. My game is finally improving. It’s all really based on Soul’s influence. He got me to read Dale Carnegie and watch the L Word. My sexuality and my comfort are so sorted. But for reals I gotta see this girl, she is nice and insanely sexy.
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