As you know, I have been experimenting with online dating for the past few months.  I have discovered that there is DEFINITELY a spectrum of girls on these sites.  The lowest site is craigs list.  The girls on there are the fattest and the most desperate.  90% of the posts on there are by women who won't even post their own pictures.  A lot of these women will post pictures of something else because they know that if it says a post has an image it's ten times more likely to get viewed.

The next level of girl posts on okcupid.  These girls are the worst.  They post a lot of pictures and are mostly using the website for affirmation.  Having experimented with this site a bit, it's basically impossible to get real meets.  Most of the profiles are questionable.  I have seen girls who have the same profile on here and pof, but they only reply to messages on there. 

Which leads me to the first website worth visiting, plenty of fish.  Using the techniques that JohnnyC69 teaches, I was able to get about 10 numbers grinding within a week.  The only problem with this site is that it's free.  So the girls on here still have no investment.  Basically the girls on here tend to be single moms or girls who guys don't approach in bars.  Here you can get dates and there are a few girls that are cute, but it's mostly 5-7s.  And really most of the girls are 5s in my humble opinion.  The good news is that the site is free so you can see new girls join every week.  Monday is the best time to check, because that's when new girls join after another crappy weekend.  Most of the girls on here are pretty average.  You can get a few dates and a few half-decent bangs, but the girls on here are on here for a reason.  And if they aren't willing to pony up a few bucks for a decent dating site, well you get what you pay for.

Then we get to Match.com.  This site is worth using for a couple of reasons.  Everyone on the site pays to be a member and you can get a free six months when you don't have a girlfriend after your first six months.  This is a sweet deal since hopefully you aren't even looking for a girlfriend.  So starting this week I am going to start giving you advice on getting dates off of match.com.  So your first mission is to join up as a free member today.  Only set up your basic profile.  Take the time to look at the girls in your area.  There is definitely more quality here than on the free sites.

We won't talk about eHarmony just yet, as that site is for people looking to get married….

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Over the past few years, I’ve done my fair share of exploration on Nashville dating sites.  My experiences have been good, bad and interesting at the very least.  Some say that online dating is for people that can’t meet someone of quality in real life.  Others will tell you that it’s a great way for busy professionals that don’t have much time to get out to meet someone.

It has been my experience that both are true.   Sure, there are a few hogs that take flattering pictures with the camera above their heads to hide their massive frames, but there are also some really sweet and beautiful women with good heads on their shoulders that are either too busy or see themselves as having outgrown the bar and club scene that are dying to meet a quality guy.

Ideally, as a man, you want to fall into the latter category.  Let’s face it: whether you’re on a dating site in Nashville or in California, if you don’t have the skills to close the deal in real life, all the tricks and techniques for getting a woman to meet you from the internet won’t do shit for you if you don’t know what to do once you’ve got her.

That being said, let’s talk about profiles.  Too many guys are falling into the trap of putting up what I call, “boyfriend resumes.”  A boyfriend resume is when a guy talks about his job, his car, hell, even his personality traits.  Don’t worry if this is you.  Just about every guy to fill out one of those things online has fallen into it.

“I’m a pretty laid back guy.  I’ve worked really hard to become a senior programmer for X company.  It’s a pretty cool job with good benefits.  My friends say I’m the life of the party….blah blah blah”

That’s a pretty extreme example of lame.  While that approach will work if you have movie star looks and money, for the rest of us, a boyfriend resume will get nothing more than an outbox full of “unread deleted” messages.

Ok, so now that I’ve covered what NOT to do, let’s talk about how to be successful with online dating sites.

SCREENING

Besides having good pictures, this is hands-down one of the most effective ways to stand out and get noticed on a dating site.  It’s more or less the polar opposite of the dating resume approach that most guys take.

See, most guys on dating sites come across as the pursuers, when they need to be coming across as the ones being pursued.  But how to do that with text?  Simple.  Write your profile like you were an employer looking for help!

“I’m not looking for someone to “complete” me.  I’m already pretty well-balanced and happy with my life.  What I would like is a companion, someone that COMPLEMENTS me.  A fun girl that can keep up with my busy lifestyle.

“You know how you hear people say that they hate drama, but really turn out to be drama magnets?  Please don’t be that person.  I’ll say it right now:  I DON’T DO DRAMA.  Be confident, be chill, be fun, be easy to talk to.  Think that’s you?  Let’s chat!”

See the difference?  The first example puts the woman in the position of selector, whereas the second example gives potential women something to STRIVE for.

Women love a challenge.  Be that for them and they will LOVE you for it.

More to come in my new book, “The Politically Incorrect Man’s Guide to Online Dating and Fornicating!”  Coming Soon!

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So I didn't want to have to post this but Johnny has been on my ass all week.  Last Friday I was out with SecretKeeper, JohnnyC69 and Inbred.  It was a weird night bc Secret is only 20 so we can't really go to the better venues.  All day long I was texting this ho I met online.  Johnny is all about pof so he has been getting me to mess around with online game.  So this girl is sending me pictures of her snatch and tits and whatknot and of course I'm showing the boys.  But we are out for a night of cold approach and she has a date.  As we are heading out I text her that if her date doesn't close the deal to let me know and I'll come over to smash her.

At midnight I get the call.

At 2am we are heading to the car and we get cat-called by two girls in a car.  Inbred runs over to talk to them.  The girl in the passenger seat is smoking hot.  The girl driving is a troll.  SInce Inbred stepped up, me and Secret head off to our car.  We see Johnny and Inbred get in the car with these two girls and I'm like Secret we need to get the F outa here or those two idiots will blow the deal.  Needless to say they have the girls drive them to Secret's car.  It's like 100% on between inbred and the smoking hot Princess.  Needless to say when we are all in the car I am giving him endless shit.  I mean wtf?  I am yelling at him and calling him a pussy.  A 10 stops her car and asks him to smash her and he can't do it. 

So then he calls her bc we made him feel so damn bad.  I just keep shouting the whole time to make him feel bad.  He can't really hear what she's saying but he tries to get her to meet up with him again.  I was like dude you blew that one!  So we are really torturing him as Secret is driving me to this online ho's house.  It's in the middle of goddam nowhere.  A good 45mins to an hour from my place.  I'm like what the crap?

But hey whatever.

Finally we get the to girl's place and I'm like Secret do not fucking drive off until I walk into the house.  Needless to say those fuckers start driving off as soon as I'm out of the car.  So I get to the front door and this chick opens it.  And my first thought it "RUN!"  But I know that if I try to get the guys to take me home they will just ditch me.  Inbred would totally do that just to get me back for the shit I was giving him for getting out of that girl's car.

So I just close my eyes kiss the girl once and say "Where do you want me to fuck you?"

I throw her into her bedroom and just shove her face on my cock and try not to look at her.  I was like I need this bitch to drive me home so I have to get through this.  So after I make her gag a bunch I just start hate fucking her.  She gets on all fours and I just push her face into the bed.  I keep grinding her face into the mattress and I'm shouting "Don't look at me!  Don't you fucking look at me!"

I mean I did NOT want to puke.

So I start slapping her ass as I can.  But it's not enough.  So I just start punching her in the ass.  I am going back and forth between grinding her face into the sheets and punching her ass.  I make her lie on the bed upside and throatfuck her and tea bag her and maker her toss my salad.  You know the stuff to make a girl feel really special.  I keep trying to think of more depraved things to do to her.  All I want to do is dehumanize her.

The ONLY reason I didn't try to get a blumpkin was bc I didn't need to shit.

So finally I finish down her throat and she is like gagging but loving it.  It's weird.  I literally haven't seen her face since she opened the door and I'm trying to keep it that way.

So I go to pee and grab my phone.  I'm texting Johnny and telling him how much I hate him and online game now and need some steel wool to shower with.  And I come out and tell her that my house mate is locked out and she needs to drive me home right away.  She is like I don't have enough gas to drive that far.

So I have to put $10 in her damn tank AND she makes me pump.  WTF is that about?  I would have put in $5 but we might have run out of gas on the way to my house, or GOD FORBID, in my parking lot. 

So the whole car ride back I'm texting Johnny and making him promise not to tell Secret and Inbred.  But that bastard is texting everyone he knows.  I'm shocked that he didn't post about it on every forum on earth.  She keeps telling me more and more lame things about herself.  Driving at night is hard on her eyes.  Her date was boring.  Dead end job.  Small house.  Tough being a single mom. 

She has 3 cats and a dog and her house was filthy dudes.

She was so gross I literally had one of the worst allergy attacks of my life in her car.  I am like turning red and crying my eyes out and she offers to stop to get an allergy pill.  I'm like fuck that.  Pharmacies have bright ass lights.  I don't wanna see her in that fucking glare.  She just keeps on saying things to make me hate her more and more and more.  Traffic confuses her.  It's hard to see the lanes at night.  Where should she turn.  Dude it's one freeway all the way to my house.

So finally she gets to my house and I don't say a word.  I just jump out and run into my house with the 6pack that Johnny made me pick up at the gas station.  That bastard found a silver lining.  I take a long shower.  I felt like Ace Ventura when he realizes that he kissed dude and just showers and cries all huddled up.

I was painted into a corner and I had to fuck my way out of it.  So I got my ride home.

Oh and Inbred started texting that girl the next day and on Sunday took her on a lunch date WITH HER AUNT.  WTF?  When he walks up she goes "Oh, I thought you would be the guy in the tie."  I WAS THE GUY IN THE TIE ONE FRIDAY!!!!  So if I had just run when she yelled to me from her car.  I would have had a 10 instead of a zero.  Ok I need to go get some more tequila to wash away my shame.

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I had a choice.  I could let her cancel the date and not see her for two more weeks or I could do something I don't normally do.  I am really trying to do things that I don't normally do.  So I decided to jump on a train and a bus and visit her.  I was able to write a chapter for my new book on the journey

I get to the station and I jump in her car.  We decide to have a picnic in the park so we grab some food from a supermarket and go there.  We don't have a blanket to lie on, just a jumper.  The park is pretty empty, but not nearly empty enough.  We have a conversation and end up talking a little bit about my work etc.

I pretty much end up telling every girl what I do.  I tell her about how I'm trying to be super duper honest.  She asks a good question.  How can she actually know I'm really honest.  I suggest she ask an innappropriate question.  I anwer honestly.  Hehe.  After a while I just feel like we're not connecting.  I just feel a distance between us.

A part of me just wanted to go home.  But another part remembered that sometimes you just can't tell if a girl likes you.  Some girls give nothing away.  I keep trying to escalate both verbally and physically but she is just shrugging me off.  She's pretty ill and wheezing a bit.  She goes to the bathroom at one point and takes a her purse with her.  I partly thought she wouldn't come back.

We decide to hit a pub for one drink even though she can't drink because of her medicine and driving.  It is warmer in there and I'm really just mellow now.  She becomes super animated and really funny.  It's strange but the heat seemed to release her personality.  It was hard to keep in mind that she was super sick.  After we finish our drinks I'm just so tired and hoping to meet a good mate for dinner in the city.

On the walk to her car I grab her and carry her a little.  She is taller than me and dense.  My spine nearly telescopes.  But she is letting me do it and we're building up some touch.  She drives me to the station and is about to drop me off out front when I'm like no way.  Pull up a little I'm shy!  So then she pulls deep into the back parking lot.  Cool.  Suddenly there is that huge end of the date awkwardness filling the car.  I can barely breathe.  I try to lock laser eyes and she avoids.

Finally, I give up.  Like a coward.  I finally give up and offer her my cheek.  She is like what the hell are you doing?  I'm like not even a cheek kiss?  Suddenly, I man up.  I grab her by the back of her hair and pull her in.  She tries to push her cheek at me.  I say I don't think so and spin her mouth to mine.  We make out for a bit and she escalates to tongues.  I like letting that happen so the girl has some responsibility for our escalation.  I almost make her take me back to hers but I don't quite feel like it's on.  Plus she is so ill and wheezy that I am afraid sex will kill her.

We have texted a few times since and I think I'll see her next week.

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I met this girl through a facebook dating thing FreedomOfSpeech recomended.  I had two dates off of it lined up for tonight, back to back.  The first one flaked and is trying to reschedule for next week, but the second one confirmed.  She looked like she might be averagish from her picture and she is czech so I decided to check it out.  I met her up tonight and I was dressed in a super cute outfit.  I was standing waiting for her at the tube station and a girl walked by and winked at me and even gave me the gun.  She was only ok looking, but I thought it was my date and she walked off.

That was the highlight of my night.

So I meet my date and she is not as cute and a little chubby for me.  I like girls really skinny.  We go to the bar and I’m off my frame.  I am really not that attracted to her but I go through the motions and end up getting stuck in my head.  It’s really unnatural for a while.  The girl was just deep boring and a little bit too conceited.  She had no date for valentine’s day because she is so pretty guys are afraid to ask her out.  I have known girls that pretty.  She isn’t.  And who talks like that.  I don’t wanna go on about my boring 90 minutes, but I was going to ditch her when I called Freedom from the toilets to get permission.

But I came back and she’d bought me a drink back.  So I had to stay for another 30minutes of hell.  God she was so lame.  Finally, I tried to kiss her, more just to do it than because I wanted her to.  She said no.  I as like you can find the train station right?  (I would have walked her back if she was lost)  She told me she can ask directions as her English is good.  I was like great and I busted out of there.

I have a better date tomorrow….I hope.

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