I have been back in my hometown for a week now.  I'm a little hesitant to say where I am, because I have some internet stalkers on a few weird forums who have been talking about my family etc.  So for now I'll let you guys figure it out.

Anyways I think about my x like every day.  It's really strange because technically we are broken up.  But in my heart I just miss her so bad.  Now at least I know that I am capable of loving someone.  The thought of eternal monogamy is pretty terrifying though.  But I guess I'll figure it out.  Just not quite yet….

No related posts.

Related posts brought to you by Yet Another Related Posts Plugin.

I hate the title of this movie and that kept me from watching it for a long time.  It is designed to catch the attention of teenage girls and I believe that is the intended audience for the movie, but the film is simply awesome.  I am not going to break down the plot there.  The truth is you will either trust me and watch this movie or not.  It still blows my mind how many guys want to get good with women, yet refuse to watch The L Word.  I have been screaming the name of that show for a full year now.  I bet you haven't watched a single episode have you?  I don't think anyone should be allowed to complain about escalation until they have watched at least 3 seasons.  It's simply necessary.

But this movie is amazing at showing the power friendship can play in social dynamics.  The sweetness of this movie is really inspiring.  If you want to really understand how relationships blossom in a dynamic way, watch this movie.  It is really powerful and moving.  You will learn a lot about all of the other prerequisites of game too, don't worry.  It has a ton of frame control, shit tests and locational comfort.

Like I said, I watched this movie for the 2nd time last night.  There is about 20 minutes I would like to cut out of the movie, as one character is just really annoying to me.  But I skip through her  scenes and it's fine now.  I think the most powerful lesson comes from the last lines of the movie.  The girl says "Are you sad that we missed it?" and the boy responds with "We didn't miss it.  This IS it."

He is so right.  Often we are so unable to live in the moment as we focus on what isn't happening in our lives.  Concerts are awesome.  I love them.  I go all the time.  What is really important is the emotions we share and the impact we have on the world.  I recommended this movie on the London forum recently.  Something tells me a lot of guys are missing this amazing movie.  And that is a shame.  Because this is it.

Related posts:

1. Women want what they can’t have
2. Don’t Be Jealous
3. What is NLP?

Related posts brought to you by Yet Another Related Posts Plugin.

So I texted her again a day later here and there and I set up a date for monday night after a short 1on1 with a student.  We met at 9 and had a single drink in a bar.  We chilled and it was nice.  Unfortunately, I finally run into the Italian girl I saw a few weeks ago when I’m with this girl.  The Italian girl is so beautiful and I can see the jealousy in her eyes.  I don’t know if that set is dead, but I am trying to avoid gaming one girl while on a date with another.  I mean a guy has to have SOME limits don’t he?

So after an hour we just start walking.  She can tell where we are going.  I am like we are just gonna chill a little at my place.  We get straight into bed and I put her into another one of my shirts.  Unfortunately, the hilarious game shirt from Starlight that I had her wear on Friday was still in the wash.  So she was wearing a shirt that I actually like and wear a lot.  We just snuggle a lot and I keep trying to escalate.  It was like the battle of Stalingrad.  A war of attrition.

It took hours to break down her defences.  She has the most arbitrary set of rules I have even encountered.  She won’t let me get under her shirt or jeans all night.  After about 6 hours I get her hot enough that she lets me party in boob town.  Usually with a girl once I’m there is it on like Donkey Kong.  But not with her.  We are making out so hot and heavy.  I decide to drop a CaliPimp move and put my finger in her mouth.  She destroys it.  I am like I gotta get my dick involved in this action.  But she is having none of it.  She won’t touch my cock at all.  Not even with her hand.

She will let me rub her crotch over her jeans, but only if we are dry humping.  If I am lying next to hear I am not allowed to touch it.  It is so strange to try and decode this girl.  I mean she has her legs wrapped around me and it is sex with a little denim in between us.  By the end I am totally naked, even though she still has her jeans on.  We dry hump like crazy and eventually I kneel over her and blow my load on her belly, but most of it gets into her belt buckle.  I wasn’t really focusing.  I probably could have come on her face, but that’s really not a big fetish for me.

Finally, I crash out and she leaves in the morning.  This time I am awake when she leaves.

I found out in the middle of the night that she has a boyfriend back home.  The source of all her resistance.  She asks how I would feel if I found out she has a boyfriend in her village and I told her I wouldn’t care.  I really don’t.  I don’t have time to be jealous or whatever.  And I certainly don’t think less of her.  Of course she wants to hook up with me.  I’m awesome sauce.

We have been on another date since, but she is staying with a host family so can’t sleep over a lot.  Mystel really likes her.  She loves his magic and she thinks she is hot and cool.  He actually warned me not to break her heart.  She sent me a text last night to let me know how special she feels with me.  Tonight is our last date before she leaves the country.  Will let you know….

Related posts:

1. The Next Level
2. Offline Trip to Germany
3. Detente with the Mouse

Related posts brought to you by Yet Another Related Posts Plugin.

All the guys at the table loved me and texted me within 24 hours.  I have some new really cool contacts in London and Brighton now.  Basically rich cool guys who seem to like hot women.  Go figure.  The night was awesome and now I have access to another club that is member's only except for this one promoter.  It's so cool to make friends.  And not have to spend cash to get there.

The good part of then night for me was chilling with my lovely Czech girl.  She was a student from an English class I taught this week.  I waited to ask her out until I finished teaching at the school.  She is really sweet and insanely beautiful.  But energy is everything.  We met up an hour early for a drink and just chilled.  I didn't amp up that much attraction as I have massive status as her teacher and I had a feeling that bringing 30 girls to a badass club would be enough.  So I just built comfort.  I teased her a lot about her country having no running water and being over run with werewolves.  We looked at her house and her little village on Google Earth on my Blackberry.  (PS Get a blackberry it's awesome!!!)  So we just chatted and had a nice time until Daxx rolled up.  He looked dapper as shit and I think that made me look really cool.

We roll up to the club and I am like a lion tamer trying to control a gaggle of girls.  Being in charge is massively stressful for me but gives so much value it's insane.  I really try to spend a lot of time with my girl and I tell all the other dudes on the table which girl is mine and I introduce all the other ones.  Each guy made an effort to make me look cooler to her.  It was awesome.  It took me HOURS to get a kiss off her.

We were standing outside having a smoke, well I was smoking.  And she was sitting on a wall and I was stood between her legs.  Each time I leaned in to kiss her she would giggle or turn her head.  Now this is important for guys new to game.  This isn't a no from a girl, this is a not yet.  Crucial distinction.  She says "what's on your mind" and I said nothing.  Then I ask her and she says nothing.  I'm like interesting.. and she says the same thing.  Sexual tension is slowly building.  I am having a little escalation anxiety to be honest.  And that is the sure sign that it is time to escalate.  So I say to her that I am thinking of kissing her.  And we kiss.  It's really lovely and sweet.

Throughout the night I have to leave her to chill with all my friend and ladies.  The whole time she is really chill and manages to make her own fun.  We dance a ton and it's really sexy and sensual.  Eventually, I ask if she's ready to go.  She asks where and I say my house.  She tells me she doesn't want to have sex.  Ha.  Why was she thinking about that?

So eventually we go outside and she wants to find her night bus home.  I take something I learned from Sebastian Drake and Switch and I just keep telling her that it's a good idea to grab a cab and come to mine.  We come back and she let's me know we're not gonna have sex again.  Now maybe I'm just a big pansie, but I really enjoy a good cuddle.  I use Sheriff's LMR tactics.  I just hand her a shirt to wear and turn around while she changes.  We spend hours looking at facebook pictures of each other, kissing and cuddling.  I get a tiny bit of over the shirt boob action. 

When I was 13, I would have killed for this kind of action. I fall asleep with her in my arms.  It's a great way to build an emotional connection with a girl.  And you can have sex in the morning!

Unless you wake up and she's gone.  With your shirt neatly folded and placed on your laptop.  I'm going to see her again.  It sucks that she's leaving so soon.  C'est la vie.

Related posts:

1. The Czech Out Girl
2. Turning 29
3. The Mad Hatter’s Tea Party

Related posts brought to you by Yet Another Related Posts Plugin.

So we meet up at 7pm on a Friday night.  She looks amazing, except for she is rocking a mustache.  This is my personal pet peeve for women.  I have have really been paying attention since this date and a LOT of women are rocking cookie dusters.  I try to ignore these things, but damn hers was pretty much a Tom Selleck situation.

To be honest I was able to put it aside and plow through the date.  I don't really have the strength to go through moment by moment of what happened.  Basically she spent the whole night picking at my frame.  I am used to major frame assault and tests.  Waht I am not used to is this tactic.  For example, when we went into the 2nd bar of the night I didn't offer to pay for her drink.  I just don't roll like that.  The girl has a high paying mayfair job and can support herself.  I don't pay for a girl as it sets the wrong frame.  I don't mind doing rounds like normal people.

She is like I guess you've never dated a French or Italian girl have you???  I was like what?  I have definately made out with both kinds. Hehe.  Anyways I was pushed onto my back foot.  All night she dropped hints about how she likes to date good-looking French snowboard instructors.  Actually, even writing this story is starting to depress me, but it's educational so listen up!  So she kept pushing about how it's classy to pay for a girl etc.  After her badgering I was like it's 2 pounds to shut this girls mouth.  We need to focus here.  On a first date she was henpecking me.  I was doing something I didn't want to to avoid a confrontation.  I should have stopped the date right here.  It's a clear sign that she is a horrible girlfriend.  This tactic will only get worse.

Now I have already mentioned that she brought up her good looking ex-boyfriends about 8 times.  I never talk about exes on a date.  It's a weird way of trying to demonstrate preselection.  I don't need to do this.  I have an awesome life.  I can ignore a girl making comments about other guy's being good looking a couple of times with no affect.  But she did it enough that it put another crack into my frame.  This girl was insidious.

Third, I told her I didn't want to talk about work.  I really hate spending an entire date talking about my coaching etc.  I told her that I'm a writer and a life-coach.  I just didn't want to spend three hours talking about pickup coaching.  For me it just makes a date boring.  So I changed the subject 30 times and told her again I don't want to talk about work.  She would keep shifting the subject back to my work by asking a new question.  She just basically interrogated me constantly.  And when I would ask her a comfort-building question she said are you gonna ask me questions all night?  When she made this comment it would poke against my frame again.

Now individually I can handle each of these attacks. I have strengthened my inner game a LOT over the past 20 months.  Now I wasn't ready for this type of frame war.  She came in softly, softly.  I didn't realize any of this until I spent the rest of the night analyzing why I was depressed after my date.  I normally am happy after a date.  I love spending time with pretty girls.

Now if there is one thing I hate on a date more than anything, it is awkward conversation over a huge ass dinner table in a brightly lit restaurant. Guess what.  She needled me into that situation.  She forced us into having a bad date and then when it was bad blamed me for it.  She wouldn't even kiss me and left at 10 to go to bed early.  I was never gonna text her or think about her again but she wrote me a huge text 2 days later.

So I waited a few days and decided to let her know that we are on two different pages.  Her text back was a frame assault on long the lines of "Of course we aren't on the same page…"  This girl was a master of frame control.  In a way I respect her ability.  It's just too bad that she uses it for evil.

So please take a lesson from my horrible date.  She boiled me slowly like a Frog.  Just took my frame 1% at a time.  The night before our date, I thought about canceling when she mentioned work early on Sat.  From now on I will cancel if I sense any trouble!

BTW drunk texting is so 2000 and LATE!  High texting is where it is AT!!!

Related posts:

1. A Nice Day for a White Wedding
2. Don’t Be Jealous
3. The Boring Date

Related posts brought to you by Yet Another Related Posts Plugin.

The Rewards

I am going on a date Friday with one of the most beautiful women I have ever seen.  She is the girl from the White Wedding and let me be honest, I have had to play this bad boy cooler than any girl in the past.  That night I saw her with another dude multiple times.  I noticed him try to kiss her and there was a lot of close-talking.  I was somehow objective.  I didn't feel anything about this other dude.  I could have been intimidated by him easily.  He was taller and bigger than me.  Wearing a fancy suit. I just didn't care.  I assumed she would come back.  And she did. Beautiful girls deal with jealousy so much.  I used to want to date girls that no one else found attractive.  Think about that one sentence for a few minutes.  Jealousy kept beautiful women from wanting me and kept me from wanting beautiful women.  High value women have active social lives that they don't want to sacrifice.  If a woman does give up her male friends for you, she will resent you.  Eventually it will come bubbling to the surface.

The Challenge

In the back of your mind, it's so easy to imagine your beautiful girl meeting a better pickup artist when you're not around.  You can't always be around.  So you have to find a way to live without jealousy.  There is no positive to this emotion.  It's our natural instinct to want to control what's ours.  We want to mark our territory and keep other guys away.  Johnny Soporno teaches an opposite mindset.  He is a guy who has beaten jealousy totally.  I'm not at that level yet.  I don't know if I want to be totally without this emotion, but I want to minimize it.

Enough Crap – How to do it

We know jealousy is bad.  We know it keeps us from beautiful women and we know that it is part of us. The first step is to decide to change.  From there just try to notice every time you become jealous or nervous.  Realize it is an expression of your insecurity.  Super high value men don't get jealous because they don't need to.  If their girl cheats, they can just replace her.  That is a powerful frame. Every time you are jealous in the club, actively try not to be.  Just think about how you are a great guy.  Work on defeating your insecurity.  Progress on your inner game development.

Final Thoughts

The way to defeat jealousy is to accept yourself.  It takes a long time to get there.  I used to be the king of freaking out when guys stole my sets.  I would like to think I have gotten over this, but not totally.  I am just on a path to mastery and sharing a few thoughts here.  It's important to realize there are no benefits to being jealous.  It is not an educational emotion.  If you lose a girl, it's better to react objectively and look at what you did wrong. It's funny but lately I have been reading the blog of a guy I worked with ages ago.  He has some of the best stuff going on right now.  I just think his blog is so hilarious and he's having crazy sexual escapades.  I called him on Monday to talk about it and he was actually jealous of some of the crazy stuff I've been involved in lately.  So guys the grass is always greener.  Really work on accepting your life and only try to change things for yourself. I haven't had a drink in over 2 weeks because I am determined to get into amazing shape.  It's not for any girl, it's only for me.  That is why I am able to endure, even though I LOVE getting drunk.  When we try to change for other people it rarely sticks, but when we try to change for ourselves we can see great results.  The core of jealousy resides in a lack of self confidence, so as you learn to love yourself, your jealousy will drift away! Good luck!

Related posts:

1. Women want what they can’t have
2. The Power of Truth
3. Finding Yourself

Related posts brought to you by Yet Another Related Posts Plugin.

A few years ago I would have stressed over every single unreturned text.  Now I send out a couple hundred messages a week to girls and mates, so one can slip through the cracks.  It takes me a long time to notice if someone is actively trying to pull away.

No idea why it ended with her.  I wish I could say that I cared, but I’m already on to the next girl.  It’s kind of a shame how girls become so replaceable after a time.  If I leave my house I meet someone beautiful.  I don’t know if this is a good or a bad thing.  I don’t pursue relationships like I used to.

Related posts:

1. The Date with the Welsh Girl
2. Why did she break up with me?
3. Weight Update

Related posts brought to you by Yet Another Related Posts Plugin.

I spent several hours last night updating my NLP with Bugsy Malone. We went through a ton of deep issues and I learned things that I did not know about myself. The whole process was really amazing and I have a couple of things to work on this week that will move me closer to my destination. I am going to start making a list of accomplishments in my life. These will become chapters in my new book. I am also going to prioritize my goals list for this year. I am going to do both of them today hopefully. I have a meeting with Jamie in an hour. He is my NLP guru, so I am looking forward to it.

Here are some of the accomplishments in my life that I have not thought about enough. (I will think of more later)

1. As a cub schout I won the pinewood derby for my entire pack. This was my whole school. At 7 I beat a ton of 18 year olds.

2. I am in MENSA. It took me years to get in.

3. I graduated uni in 3 years instead of 4.

4. I won the Latin medal in Latin III in high school. (After getting kicked out of honors..hehe)

5. I moved to Wales, Japan and the UK on my own and survived.

6. I won the high school debate tournament at Bronx School of Science. Which my school has never won before or since.

7. I qualified for the junior olympics twice in tae kwon do.

8. I started the first ever blood drive at my high school.

9. I have been with a woman funnier, better looking and better in bed than my oneitis.

10. I saved the soccer game in high school, when the main goalie broke his arm.

11.  I saved my friend from drowning.

12. I have DJed in clubs in the uk, japan and usa.

13.  I had a podcast in the top 10 on itunes

14.  As a DJ I havehad fan mail from all over the world.

15. I had a radio show in london.

16. I climbed 2 mountains in japan even though i'm afraid of heights.

17. I have partied with billionaires and not spent a penny.

18.  I was offered a job teaching uni.

19.  I was one of the top sales reps at dell.

20. I won the regional championships for nintendo video game tourney at blockbuster 2 years in a row.

21. I was a national merit scholar, with the highest score in my whole school on the psat with a 235

22.  I won university of georgia bulldog debates 2 years in a row.

23. I have been offered a record deal for 2 different tracks.

24. I talked my way out of jail in tunisia.

25. I spoke at the LoveSystems superconference.

Related posts:

1. Accomplishments in my Life
2. Goals for 2009
3. Pickup Artist

Related posts brought to you by Yet Another Related Posts Plugin.

I met a smoking hot girl with Stickler a full year ago.  It was the first time I met Sheriff and I remember every detail of the set.  The girl was insanely beautiful and we were working her and her friend.  Then her boyfriend came back. I just ignored her and talked to him.  We even got some pics of all three of us.  I got her facebook and emailed her.  She is one of the hottest girls I've met in the last year. 

She replied to that initial email just last week.  I was so surprised.  What's amazing is the detail with which I can remember meeting her.  Tells you about the impression she made.  Polish.  Insanely beautiful.  I still remember where she works.  I never remember that!

So we are chatting on im tonight and I am trying to play it cool. She brings up "so when are we gonna go out"…Actually I could copy and paste the whole conversation, but I think it would be boring.  Long story short we are going out Friday.  I'm feeling pretty good again.

I just hope that she doesn't flake or this will become an embarassing post.  Haha.

Related posts:

1. Conquistador – The First Date
2. Bad Internet Date
3. A Day with an AFC

Related posts brought to you by Yet Another Related Posts Plugin.

So I have to come up with a problem I want to work on using nlp stuff. I try to think of a problem to work on that isn’t totally game related. I decided to pick something really challenging that I think about a lot. Why not? It’s all or nothing. I told her about how I am really working on releasing my body issues. I thought it would be relevant since I was going to mexico the next day. I’m on the flight writing this on my little computer right now. So I told her 2 issues I want to break through. The main one is feeling fat. I want to become totally one with my body and not care if i’m fat or skinny. To just feel it as irrelevant. I also want to break through the barrier that keeps me from going to the gym as much as I should. After I ran 5km on monday, I didn’t go to the gym the rest of the week. I feel like I have this psychological block that triggers whenever I hit a certain weight. I don’t push myself that final level to get the body I want.

We did a ton of time line therapy, which is really emotionally draining. I won’t go into too many details, but we went back to the first moment I felt fat and talked through the emotions and the things I should have known back then as a child. We did this for a long time and I think I feel better today. We also talked about how I get mad when people call me fat. I got furious when a girl in class called me fat last week. So she wanted to do another time regression thing to the first time I ever got angry.

So more marching along that timeline. It was a real bastard. At first I couldn’t think of that moment and it all felt cloudy. In the end we got there and worked through it. I am supposed to not be as angry about stuff anymore. We did a future timeline thing to test if stuff was working. I was supposed to think of something that would make me angry, so I imagined my best friend banging my oneitis. And I got super furious. She was like I guess this isn’t working. Then I told the main teacher what I was imagining and she was like, no you’re supposed to get angry at that! Try something tamer. So I thought about peopl making me wait at ticket gates on the underground. I felt disconnected from my anger.

This whole thing is supposed to take a long time for change to happen so I guess I will see. I am not believing or disbelieveing. I’m in a state of simply not knowing yet. I hope it works. I will see how things go in mexico. So far I just feel really mellow. This morning I was really stressed about being late for my plane. Every train on the way to the airport was late. I wasn’t nearly as stressed as I normally get. And I didn’t get angry. I do hope that I can get even more mellow. I’m definitely more interested in quality nlp than ever. I like the parts that are focused on self improvement and improving connections with people. It’s much more interesting than the nlp stuff some guys teach that is focused on getting girls. I really don’t need that help right now. I want to improve me.

We did a 3^rd exercise to help me get through that barrier keeping me from going to the gym enough. So we did a drill to give me a motivation trigger. It seemed cool, but I don’t know if it worked yet. I really hope so. The lady asked me to tell Bugsy about my progress and he’ll let her know.

Overall it was a really good experience. I learned a lot and it was so emotionally draining and challenging. I think it was really good and I’m glad that he picked me to be his assistaant. Unfortunately, I had to rush off to see Watchmen, so I didn’t get to talk with him as much about it. I think that’s ok. I need a little more time to work through my emotions and experience. Anyways, I recommend exploring nlp as a path of self-improvement. I like that aspect of it.

Related posts:

1. challenge feedback
2. The Jasshole
3. Facing our Fears

Related posts brought to you by Yet Another Related Posts Plugin.