So last night I was on my 2nd date with the German. She went home due to a miscommunication, so I went back to the lesbian bar. But I’m getting ahead of myself.
Part 1
I meet up with the lesbian I went out with last fall in Leicester Square. She has 2 girls with her. One is a sexy blond she is trying to bang and the other is that girl’s friend. A freckly, young brunette. They are all gay, so I just chill and don’t think about game etc. We hit up a mixed gay club and find a little spot to toss down a few drinks. I chat to the blond some and talk about being dating coach. She is a writer and will hopefully take me to an opera. We go for a dance and we start grinding like crazy. Mostly to torture my friend.
She tells me that she only became gay for her current girlfriend and that the relationship has reached a plateau. She is wondering what to do next. I smell opportunity. We joke about my friend’s crush etc. I say she would freak out if we kiss, the grinding is already bothering her. She says let’s do it and we start frenching. Now I have two Xs who went gay right after me. So I feel I am owed some compensation. Fair enough right? So we are making out and her hand is on my ass. It’s funny because everything feels a little off, even her dancing. So I ask if she’s the dom in the relationship. I’m totally right and it explains why she kisses like a man. She keeps leading.
When we kiss my friend rushes up and breaks us apart and yells at the girl for having a girlfriend. It’s hilarious because we all know my friend wants to bang this blond! Everyone disappears and I end up alone with the blond for a while. We are just chilling. Then we go outside and find them all and I have to go back to my date with the German Girl.
Part 2
After the debacle of the German Girl going home from work early, I head back to the lesbian/gay club. It takes about 15 minutes. I would say I was gone for 30-40 minutes. I can’t find any of the girls I know. I am texting my friend and the cute blond and no love! I am standing on the middle of the dance floor and wondering where they all are. I am trying to control my frame and not feel uncomfortable. It’s more that none of my mates are there than it being a gay club. I mean the first club I ever went to was a gay club on my 18th birthday. Another lovely tale from my memoirs.
So I am waiting for a text back or something. I mean it sucks that my date fell apart and now this! So then I go outside after what feels like a thousand years, but was just 3 songs or something. I run into two other girls from earlier that I didn’t talk to that much. We start chatting and they are hugging me and screaming. It’s all good. They drag me inside and buy me 2 shots. These girls don’t play. They musta bought me like 10 shots last nite!
Things get fuzzy from here. So I’m not sure about the order of events anymore.
I am standing outside alone while the Freckly girl is all over some other girl I don’t know. This freckly blond comes and asks for a light. Within 5 minutes she is LOVING me. She starts asking me about the scene in LA. I tell her I’m not gay and she tells me that I pull of gay man very well. I think it’s a compliment. My friend rolls up right then from taking the hot blond to the bus stop and is visibly impressed by me skillz. The girl is telling my mate how she loves me and I’m super amazing.
Some dude tells me I look like wolverine. Another tells me I look like a guy from Big Brother. They are both trying to bang me. I smile and play coy.
I am dancing with a couple girls and a twink, when on of the bartenders starts making out with the freckly girl. I look away and when I look back he is fingerblasting her. Impressive.
I am standing at the bar while the two girls are buying me even more shots and the hottest black girl I’ve ever seen rolls up in between us and starts talking to me. I’m trying to play it cool. Ten seconds later she is making out with some other hot chick. This bar is rocking a lot of hot girl on girl action. Hopefully, I will see this girl again next time…..
When the night ends I offer to have the girls come to mine for guitar hero and some smoke. They all decline except for freckly girl, who then asks if she can stay at mine. We share a cab with another girl who is going a little farther. We come back to mine, smoke a little and bang for a few hours. Even some morning bang. While she was asleep I hit the toilet and was looking for her panties. I mean we were banging right under the ones I nicked the other week. She was wearing tights so I guess no panties. Sigh.
In the morning we bang more and she is like the quietest girl ever. It’s so strange. I’m like did you come babe? She says no, so I know what I gotta do. I bring spider man into bed with us and I make her squirt. There is a big stain on my bed right now bitches! I am so glad I took that sex skills class.
Then we are on the couch smoking some and I try to get her to blow me. I mean what could be cooler than that. She’s like ‘I don’t know you that well…” Girls have the strangest arbitrary rules. I walk her to the bus stop and say I’ll see her at the lesbian bar next week. She asks me not to tell her friends we banged. She doesn’t want to be judged.
So when my friend texted this morning I told her nothing happened. Also she told me this morning she’s not gay. Fair enough. I think I might be the cure for lesbianism.
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