So last night I went out with Ghost to me new local. It was heaving out and about. There was some kind of festivale on. We met up with Virgo, who was out on a date. All of the people who were supposed to meet up with us ended up backing out. Oh well. The music was good and the vibe was chill. No Brotherhood guys were around so I didn’t have to open. I could just relax. I helped Virgo look cool by talking uphill to him in front of his girl. Like all vampires, in the end he made her bleed. But you’ll have to read his post to see about that… After a while, I dipped out to avoid spending time with my former, needy couchsurfer. She is going to be a social circle asset, but not quite yet. I need a little time you know?
So I bounced bars to meet up with Vercetti, Mr M, Braddock, Crossfire et al. It was hella crowded and took me ages to get there. Outside the bar I see Dr. Yen. I was like wtf? I thought you left. I don’t wanna go on a big tangent, but if you have a leaving party, then you need to leave. Lately, guys have stayed weeks or months longer and had a series of leaving parties. This is just way to needy. Stop twisting to see how popular you are. Just go. It’s like a funeral. You grieve and you don’t want the person to show up do you? I mean isn’t that why we all hate zombies? So he kept trying to get me to leave my spot in line to come say hi. I was like it’s not my job to impress your random chick by obeying commands. I don’t like riding the alpha train. He could have walked over to me, so I wouldn’t have to lose my spot in line. So I walked into the club.
It took me ages to find the guys. Everyone was hella drunk. I ran super super tight Shane game on this girl and her friend. Everyone tried to game my target, so I just ratcheted up attraction in the obstacle. She was cute in my opinion. I ran my ShaneKiss on her and she just melted and said, how did that happen? I didn’t even want to kiss you. I said that’s the power of Shane, but she had no idea what that meant. I really ratcheted up attraction by being super cool and aloof.
In the end I just said come home with me. Unfortunately, drunken Braddock creeped out her friend enough to make her leave the club. So they bounced after she gave me her number and was like maybe I’ll see you this week. So then I’m there listening to Vercetti hate on the girl. After he shouted grenade while I was kissing her. Man, some people’s true colors… So then we are chatting about sets and stuff. This other American dude was trying to be really alpha and say that he doesn’t need wings or something. Maybe he knows some of the other guys. I don’t really know. He’s one of those guys that puts up his middle finger in group photos. Basically, the worst kind of American. So I just ignored him. There is nothing worse than people who try really hard to be alpha or tough or whatever. It just bores me now.
So the girl comes back. She tells me that her friend thought I looked like a really good guy too. She is like facebook me tomorrow. I was like come home with me now. But she couldn’t because of her friend. All of the guys I knew in the club had tanked with her already, so nothing doing. So I was like come over tomorrow night to f me. She is like you have to write down directions. Then I got really sexual, but I went too far when I said I could smell how bad she wanted me. So I had to retreat. Then I got her facebook stuff and she left.
Then I see Mr M and Braddock working some girls. Braddock grabs me to come with them and the three of us are outside with 2 really cute girls and a fat one. I wonder which one is for me…. Thanks B!!! So we go back to Mr M’s, which is like one block away. And we are chilling in one bedroom together. I distract the girl a little bit, but she is clearly twice my size. I am a terrible wrestler.
So then I start working Mr M’s target. I can smell a spitroast in the air. I tell a bunch of jokes and wratchet up attraction so fast. I can tell she is into me. She keeps telling me that I’m the funniest guy she’s ever met. I’m in a super alpha Shane state. So I kiss her on his bed. She is lying on her back and Braddock has taken his girl upstairs to show her the bathroom. We are on either side of her and the fat girl is sitting on the computer playing with music and making slight noises of boredom. This is Paladin’s liver not caring. So Mr M looks at me with trepidation in his eyes. He is like sorry dude I can’t do it. The girl can sense the change in mood and things slipped through my fingers….
She got weird and then drank too much and spent 20 minuted puking out his bathroom. Eventually we shoved them into a cab. And sent home drunky mcpukey and chubby mcnofun to their hotel. The other girl sent them off and then went back inside to finish off Braddock.
Overall it was some of the most fun I’ve had in ages. We went off in search of a curry, but every shop was closed. So I went home to find out what time school starts and rack one off. Turns out I was wrong and school doesn’t start for one more day. Safe.
0 comment